10 Ways to be a Good Mom

As a mom, life can be unpredictable. The stress we face on a daily basis is sometimes unbearable. Our daily lives can turn from smooth to chaotic in a split second. We read article after article to try to “figure it out.” We compare our kids to other kids and give ourselves a pat on the back when our child doesn’t throw a tantrum in the grocery store. But what truly measures the quality of motherhood? Is it measurable?

The question has crossed every mother’s mind: Am I a good mom? 

Here are 10 ways that I think every mom can be great:

1. Teach your children biblical principles – Ephesians 6:4 “…bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.”
2. Encourage your children – 1 Thessalonians 5:11 “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up.”
3. Discipline your children – Proverbs 13:24 “Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.”
4. Stay calm in stressful situations – 1 Peter 5:7 “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”
5. Create structure throughout the day
6. Love your children’s father – Ephesians 5:22 “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.”
7. Be selfless – Philippians 2:3 “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.”
8. Improve your own relationship with God and everything else will fall into place – Matthew 6:33 “Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”
9. Don’t worry – Matthew 6:27 “Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?”
10. Express your love to your children daily through words and actions – John 13:34 “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.”

I know there are a lot of ways to assess your job as a mom, but before going to any other resources, I go to the Bible. This list helps me remember that I’m doing a great job when I feel like I’m failing.

To every mom out there: You’re doing a great job!

God Bless.

A Step Toward A Healthier Family

Fall is here! According to the calendar, at least. In Texas, we are still hitting 80 degree temperatures! Grrrr. I would like for it to cool down a little more because Fall is about chilly weather, jackets, colorful trees, and runny noses. Yes, the dreadful days when snotty-nosed kids wipe snot on the sleeves of their shirts are right around the corner! Yippee! *sarcasm*

It’s inevitable. Our children will most likely catch something this Fall/Winter whether it be a slight cold or full blown pneumonia. Especially here in Texas where the temperatures decide to change drastically from 80 degrees one day to 50 degrees the next. Of course, we would all rather be soaking up sun at the pool than bundling up in multiple layers just to walk outside. Well, I guess I should speak for myself ☺

So, what do we do at the first sign of sickness? Run to the drugstore, check the medicine cabinet, call the doctor, or google our symptoms (isn’t technology great?). Although the latter usually just creates panic in my mind because so many possibilities pop up at the click of a button! What if I told you to ditch the drugstore because there is a better product out there for any and all of your wellness needs? You would most likely think I’m crazy. I mean how could we live without Tylenol, Benadryl, Zyrtec/Claritin, and all the other drugs we use?

I, personally, have never liked giving my kids these drugs because I know their tiny little bodies have to process them and the side effects, which usually include drowsiness, that come along with them. I don’t know about you, but I won’t want my baby walking around like a zombie just because I gave him something to help his runny nose. It’s just not worth it to me, which is why I found something better; something that will ease my mind and have zero side effects.

It is Young Living Essential Oils. Some of you may have heard of them already because they are the world leader in essential oils. They produce the most authentic oils because of their seed to seal production process. They are awesome! I have always liked a more natural approach to health and have used essential oils in the past, but I just ordered my starter kit, which came with 11 oils, a diffuser, and some samples. I’m so excited to take control of my family’s health without any worries in my mind. There is seriously an oil for everything!

Of course, I’m not saying to never use any drugs ever again, but try these first and you will be surprised at how effective they are. Leave a comment below if you would like more information or to order your very own starter kit! You can also visit the company’s website, which has a lot more information than I have given you.

God bless!

The Most Uncomfortable Day of the Year

It’s the day dreaded by most women. The one day each year we have to reveal all of ourselves to some stranger. It’s the one person who can get us naked on the first “date.”  They ask the most awkward questions and don’t beat around the bush. The appointment takes over an hour even though they can’t spend too much time with you. If you haven’t figured out who I’m talking about yet, take a quick guess. You’re right, the dreaded gynecologist.

I had my yearly exam this morning and went to a new doctor because my insurance changed. So, I only knew him by his online reviews. I’m usually a little anxious before these appointments, but today I was a little more nervous because a) I was going to a new place and b) I had never met the man. It’s awkward uncomfortable. I’ll be honest.

After filling out new patient paperwork for 15 minutes, the nurse called me back from the waiting room. She took my weight and blood pressure and took me back to a room to ask me some questions. I smiled and made conversation, trying to keep the mood lighthearted in my nervousness. Not once did she crack a smile. She was all business and treated the patients like an assembly line.

“How old are you?” She asked.
“Twenty four,” I answered.
“Have you ever been pregnant?”
“Yes, twice.”
“Any abortions?”
“Umm, no…” I wanted to go on, but held my tongue. This question bothered me. Maybe because I’m pro-life. Or maybe because abortions are so common nowadays and it made me think of all the unborn babies who are being killed each year.
“Are you sexually active?”
I wanted to ask her if she read my chart at all because I checked the “married” box, so I would hope I was sexually active! If not, I don’t think my husband would be a very happy camper, haha. But I calmly replied “Yes.”

After various other questions, she told me to go back out in the waiting room. Then another nurse called me back. She wasn’t much better. She asked if I was a new patient and I said yes. Side note: GEEZ, DO ANY OF YOU LOOK AT MY CHART!? I was expecting a “Well, I’m glad you chose our office. I hope we make you feel comfortable.” Instead I got a cold description of what was going to take place.

She left the room and I got undressed. I sat there in those wonderful paper garments, shivering, waiting for the doctor and wondering why they have to keep the rooms so dang cold! He came in and didn’t waste any time. He started feeling my boobs and putting objects and fingers in places I shouldn’t mention. But we all know what happens, right? Well, after a couple minutes, he was finished and said, “Have a nice day.” And I was thinking, Yeah you probably do if you do that to a bunch of women every day! I got up feeling completely violated.

Thank goodness I don’t have to do that again for another year.

The Bond Between Brothers

I saw it the very first time my boys met. I could almost feel it. My oldest son’s eyes were full of awe, excitement, and curiosity as daddy introduced the newest addition to our family. He stared lovingly at his baby brother even though he was still a baby himself at only 13.5 months. It was love at first sight and a moment that had the power to melt anyone’s heart.

The bond that was formed that day has only grown in the past 9.5 months. Both of their faces light up with huge smiles every time they see each other when waking up in the morning. They love giving hugs. Benjamin wants to be just like his older brother, so he tries to take all of his toys. We are still working on sharing… I see a long road ahead! Tyson is always concerned about the baby. If I take him somewhere alone and he sees the baby’s car seat is empty, he asks in the sweetest voice, “where’s baby?” Almost implying that I forgot him! When Benjamin wakes up from a nap and Tyson hears him on the monitor, he runs to the bedroom to greet him. It’s so sweet. Tyson even tries to soothe Benjamin by giving up his pacifier if he’s fussy.

The Bible talks about brotherly love quite a bit and I believe it’s for a reason. The love that brothers have for each other before they can even talk is apparent. I am a witness.

“Be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love; in honor giving preference to one another.” Romans 12:10

NKJV

“Let brotherly love continue.” Hebrews 13:1

KJV

“I am distressed for you, my brother Jonathan; you have been very pleasant to me; your love to me was wonderful, surpassing the love of women.” 2 Samuel 1:26 NKJV

I love having two boys so close together. I never thought a sibling would bring Tyson so much joy. And I know they will only grow closer as the years pass. This is one of the reasons everyone should have more than one child 🙂

A Letter to My Mom

Dear Mom,

Now that I’m a mother myself, I realize how much you did for me growing up. I know I gave you plenty of sleepless nights, dirty diapers, clothes to wash, tantrums, dishes, pee-soaked sheets, attitude, headaches, tears, and much more. And to think I was your fifth girl in a row. I thought two was hard; I can’t even begin to imagine what we put you through.

But the truth is, as moms, we don’t focus on the trials – mainly because we are moving a million miles a minute. If we lingered over our failures – the way we lost our temper earlier that day or the fights our kids were having with each other – we would miss the most important, precious moments because, let’s face it, motherhood is not always easy. It’s not always fun. It’s not always convenient. It’s hard work!

I heard a quote recently that says:
“You spend years wishing your parents would get off your back, only to realize they’re the only ones who ever really had it.”

This is so true! I know you were looking out for my best interest even when I thought you were just being mean to me when I was a teenager.

Everyone always says they don’t want to end up like their parents, but I hope I can learn from your mistakes and your successes and raise my two boys as good as you raised me.

Thank you for being the best mother to me even when I didn’t appreciate and respect you.

Love,
Teresa

Praying for Your Children

If you’ve been following my blog for a couple months now, you probably remember my post about the 30-day mom makeover challenge. I know I said it already, but I really encourage all the mamas out there to subscribe to that challenge (found here)!

Shortly after completing the mom makeover, I decided to start the 30-Day Praying for your Children. They send daily verses and prayers to pray over your children, which I thought was pretty neat.

Oftentimes as mothers, we are constantly tending to our kids. Doesn’t it seem like every time we try to sit down for just a minute, we are being pulled right back up? I know that’s true for me. If I seem unoccupied, my toddler definitely changes that quickly. Anyways, my point is that a lot of times we rush around all day – changing diapers, preparing food, wiping faces, resolving fights, cleaning up messes, giving baths – and then all of a sudden we are putting the kids to bed and wonder where the day went. After the kids are asleep is when I reflect on that day. We may wish we hadn’t lost our temper about something insignificant or gotten impatient and walked away instead of taking a deep breath and trying again. We can beat ourselves up as much as we want to about those things, but we can only look forward to doing better tomorrow.

When I was in my young teenage years and I felt like my mom was treating me unfairly, I used to say, “I’m not going to be like my mom when I have kids.” Although I said that back then, I don’t feel the same way now. It’s funny how our attitudes toward parenting form at such a young age. You may have said, “I’m never going to spank my child” or “I’ll always let my child go to their friend’s house” and the opposite came true after having children. In short, we all have parenting goals in mind before we have kids. We may strive to be patient, assertive, encouraging, slow to anger, loving, etc., but the most important goal we should have is to be prayerful.

Here are the topics that are included in the 30-Day Pray for your Children:

1. Salvation
2. Growth in Grace
3. Love
4. Honesty and Integrity
5. Self Control
6. Love for God’s Word
7. Justice
8. Mercy
9. Respect
10. Biblical Self Esteem
11. Faithfulness
12. Courage
13. Purity
14. Kindness
15. Generosity
16. Peace-loving
17. Joy
18. Perseverance
19. Humility
20. Compassion
21. Responsibility
22. Contentment
23. Faith
24. A Servant’s Heart
25. Hope
26. Willingness and Ability to Work
27. Passion for God
28. Prayerfulness
29. Gratitude
30. A Heart for Missions

You can subscribe here to receive the bible verses and prayers daily! They are really simple and short and you can pray these over your kids after they’re asleep or as soon as you open the email!

Don’t let life go by too fast. Take time to enjoy and appreciate the little lives that God entrusted to you. Most of all, pray for them!

Let Your Hair Down

Today, the June weather wasn’t extremely hot here in Texas, so I decided to load up the boys in the double stroller and get a little exercise. We headed out and I was set on getting a good workout before nap time. Tyson, my toddler, isn’t into riding in the stroller so much anymore. He likes to help me push the baby or explore the outdoors. Half way down the first street, he looks back at me and says, “Out,” as he pulls on his buckle. I calmly reply, “Just a minute, buddy.” This should be an interesting walk. I thought to myself.

The trail that we walk on has a little creek running beside it. Tyson has an obsession with throwing things into the water, fishing, or anything water related actually. So I’m sure you can imagine how challenging it is to keep him in the stroller and not in the water!

After about 10 minutes on the trail and hearing Tyson’s sweet voice asking to get out every other step, I finally stopped and said, “Okay, you can get out.” He practically ran over to the creek. You could see the excitement on his face. If I wasn’t holding his hand, he would have walked right in! Meanwhile, my 8-month-old is lounging in the stroller, content as can be.

As a mom who is very schedule-oriented, it was kind of difficult for me to stop walking and accept the fact that this moment we were having was far more important than burning calories. Did I mention nap time was quickly approaching? In my mind, I was trying to calculate how long naps would be at this point so they wouldn’t interfere with bedtimes. Okay, he can still sleep a couple hours. We will stay another 5 minutes. Relax. I was trying to tell myself to relax! Maybe I’m a little OCD about schedules! I just know my kids have always done better when they’ve been on a schedule.

And then as Tyson and I were finding rocks to throw into the water, a certain peace came over me. I felt God’s presence in the middle of that moment. Suddenly, I was okay with naps being cut short today. God said, “Enjoy my creation with your son, the blessing I’ve given to you.”

After a little while, Tyson got back into the stroller and we continued walking, but stopped often to enjoy more of nature! When we returned home, my husband was mowing the lawn and of course, Tyson wanted to help. And I was okay with it even though it was getting later and later.

I had to realize that spending quality time with my sons was far more important than napping or exercising. Being a mother means providing structure for your kids, but sometimes you just have to let your hair down! The world isn’t going to fall apart if the kids don’t go down at 2 o’clock on the dot!

I thank God for teaching me lessons like this throughout my everyday activities. I don’t always have time to spend with Him, but I know he is with me every step of every day.

The Goal of Motherhood

I read this blog a couple of months ago and absolutely loved this post. It helped me see motherhood from a different perspective, so I thought I would share it! I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

Written by Gloria Furman

Motherhood is a piece of evidence of God’s triumphant agenda to give life despite the curse of death. It is a gift that points us to Jesus. As life marches on to the praise of God’s glory, we see a riveting display of the grace of our Father, who will fulfill His promise to give His Son an inheritance of nations to the praise of His glory. There’s no greater goal than that.

Motherhood is about the adoration and enjoyment of our great God.

There are superfluous ideas circulating in the world that try to explain the goal of motherhood. Many of these ideas have a spiritual bend to them, describing motherhood as an expression of “the human spirit” or a metaphor for “Mother Earth.”

Motherhood Is a Mercy

As Christians, we understand that any spiritual guidance for motherhood that attempts to connect a woman to God apart from the substitutionary atoning death of Jesus cannot ultimately succeed. Jesus’s claim to be “the way, and the truth, and the life” (John 14:6) has implications for the way we view our role as mothers. The lens of the profound reality of the gospel is where we see motherhood for what it is—a mercy.

With Adam and Eve’s sin in the garden, all their progeny along with them were justly indicted and condemned to death. Despite their grievous sin, God not only allowed life but facilitated it and sustains it still today. The mercy shown to us at the cross of Jesus Christ is the pinnacle of God’s lavish grace. Herman Bavinck wrote,

Based on that sacrifice [Christ], God can wrench the world and humanity out of the grip of sin, expand His kingdom, gather up all things under Christ as its head, and one day be all in all. No one, not even Satan, can say a word against this.

Even while we steal God’s glory and insist that motherhood exists to serve our egos and our reputations, God gives us more mercy still. Even while we wring our hands anxiously over God’s timing for our family, God graciously continues to fulfill His eternal purposes in creating each and every member of our family. Relieved of our self-oriented passions, we can rejoice in the reconciliation we receive through Jesus, embrace God’s purposes in our motherhood, and smile at the future as we look forward to the future grace that is ours in Christ Jesus.

God designed motherhood to highlight His great mercy and point us to who we (and our children) were made for: the eternally satisfying risen Christ (John 17:24).

Motherhood Is About God’s Glory

The joys of today’s motherhood are true joys, but they are like shadowy reflections in a mirror. At the end of every day—chaotic and mundane alike—motherhood is about the adoration and enjoyment of our great God. The seraphim in heaven continually cry out, “And one called to another and said: ‘Holy, holy, holy is the Lord of hosts; the whole earth is full of His glory!’ (Isa. 6:3).

Even while we go about the exhausting work of motherhood that oftentimes feels so futile, we can be about what we’re going to be about forever. In Revelation 5 John sees a vision of the risen Christ, glorified and reigning. In verse 13 John tells us how everyone responds to Jesus:

And I heard every creature in heaven and on earth and under the earth and in the sea, and all that is in them, saying, “To Him who sits on the throne and to the Lamb be blessing and honor and glory and might forever and ever!”

Forever in eternity we will be praising the Lord, and even now we can praise Him as we know Jesus Christ and Him crucified for us.

Allow motherhood to incline your heart to worship, and bless the Lord who fills your hands with blessings.

I will extol you, my God and King, and bless your name forever and ever. Every day I will bless you and praise your name forever and ever. Great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised, and His greatness is unsearchable (Ps. 145:1–3).

Praising our great and merciful God is a mother’s anthem—the song she’ll be singing forever and ever!

How would looking at motherhood this way change the way you go about your daily routine?

————–

Editor’s Note: Gloria Furman, Treasuring Christ When Your Hands Are Full (Wheaton, IL: Crossway, 2014) Excerpt adapted from Chapter 11: The Metanarrative of Motherhood

1 Herman Bavinck, Reformed Dogmatics: Sin and Salvation in Christ (Grand Rapids:Baker Academic, 2006), 455.

Redefining “Stay-at-home Mom”

I, personally, think it’s hilarious when someone asks me what I do all day as a stay-at-home mom (SAHM). Some women may take it offensively, but I really just laugh to myself and think, If you only knew! I’m sure every SAHM has been asked this question at least once.

The term “stay-at-home” is a bit misleading and misinterpreted. Yes, I physically stay at home with my kids, but that by no means includes me being lazy. In fact, I rarely sit down! And I probably work harder than most people in corporate America!

I had my first son shortly after graduating from college in 2012. I remember when I was pregnant, my friends would ask me, So, do you plan to work after having the baby? After all, I had just received my Bachelor’s degree. My answer: Yes! I plan to work harder than I ever have in my entire life! Just because I didn’t plan to get a job with a salary didn’t mean I wouldn’t be working. And I think that’s where the term “stay at home” gets misinterpreted. Our workplace IS the home, which means we never get a break.

We aren’t sitting around catching up on the latest episode of Keeping Up With The Kardashians. We aren’t sitting by the pool drinking a margarita. We are changing poopy diapers, getting peed on, breastfeeding, cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, going to doctor appointments, resolving fights, teaching good manners, and much more! Our job isn’t glamorous. Our job isn’t always fun. But it is the most rewarding.

Being a SAHM means being a cook, housekeeper, teacher, chauffeur, accountant, appointment setter, doctor, professional shopper, schedule maker, mediator, and personal assistant. I don’t get any days off. My salary doesn’t come in the form of a paycheck. But I wouldn’t have it any other way.

So, do I like the term SAHM? Not necessarily, although it is accurate in the sense that I do not leave the house to go to work. I’ve heard some people, instead, say Domestic Goddess, which I don’t like either. When I hear the word goddess I picture a glowing super model with perfect hair and makeup and, let’s face it, I hardly ever fix my hair and the only glow I have may be the sweat on my forehead from the Texas heat.

Why can’t we just be called moms, mothers, mommies, mums, mamas? After all, we don’t call dads, “go-to-work dads”!

This image pretty much sums it up!

15 Ways You Know You’re a Mom of Boys

My life is far from boring. Being a mom of two boys under the age of 2 is quite entertaining. I’m sure many of you can relate! My boys are definitely ALL boy. I’m sure I could create a never ending list, but here is a list of 15 ways you know you’re a mom of boys:

1. You’re always feeding them. Some days I feel like I never leave the kitchen!

2. A scratch on their face or bump on their head doesn’t shock you. It’s always funny when someone (usually my mom or mother-in-law) asks where one of my sons got a scratch, bump, or bruise, and I answer I don’t even know! It’s like they just randomly appear!

3. You find a nacho cheese Doritos hand print on the butt of your white pants. Yes, this happened to me last week. I guess mommy is as good of a napkin as anything!

4. You aren’t scared of a poopy diaper. It happens. LOTS of it. Up the back, out the sides. Anytime. But usually when you’re getting ready to walk out the door.

5. Inside voices don’t exist. This one is self explanatory. I’m not even sure my toddler knows what shhhh means.

6. Things are being thrown constantly. Everything is a ball. Enough said. Flying objects don’t even scare me anymore.

7. “Don’t hit each other” are common words that come out of your mouth. I’m not sure why boys are so fascinated with hitting! My toddler actually thinks it’s funny and laughs when I say ouch.

8. Sound effects are part of your vocabulary. Sometimes I think boys are born knowing these noises. A new one comes out daily.

9. You get headbutted when you least expect it. And it hurts! When did kids get so strong?!

10. Getting farted on doesn’t phase you. Need I explain?

11. You freak out if your kids are quiet. As the saying goes, a quiet child is a suspicious child.

12. You don’t need toys as long as you have dirt. I don’t even know why I go to the trouble to buy toys. Dirt can entertain boys for hours. I think Oh, he will really like this ball! Then he ends up playing with the bag it came in! On Christmas, the wrapping paper was cooler than the gifts.

13. Wrestling is your favorite pastime. I cannot sit on the floor without being jumped on.

14. Your kids love being naked. Who needs clothes anyway? Only wearing a diaper is much more comfortable!

15. When they stop what they’re doing and hug you, it melts your heart. I love being a mom of boys. They bring me so much joy and laughter.